Polyamory.
I'm sure by just reading that one word you already have an opinion
formed. Monogamy is a much easier relationship arrangement than
polyamory, even if you have trouble being monogamous.
In a true
polyamorous relationship, all the partners involve have to strive to
make sure that everyone gets equal time and attention with everyone
else involved and that jealousy and strife are kept to a minimum.
From personal experience, I can assure you that giving equal time to
everyone and keeping jealous thoughts and actions at a minimum is
much easier typed than done.
Polyamory,
and other such free love concepts like open relationships and
swinging, also entail a great deal of responsibility. The lovers
involved have the responsibility of fidelity, emotional support and integrity, and contraception--for both the prevention of disease and
children. I've noticed that a lot of Pagans, in particularly men but
not always, think "oh, we're all about nature and such we don't
need condoms" or they leave it all up to the woman (which just
seems to be a universal male tendency).
Or, which is more truthful,
the people involve just don't care. When this happens, you end up
with a lot of unexpected children that often are not financially or
emotionally supported by the father. I've been hearing about this
more and more in the community and it bothers me. Polyamory does not
mean that you can leave a trail of bastards behind you as you bounce
from one festival to another or even one group to another.
It does
not mean that you can sprinkle your seed across the land like
dandelion down, nor does it mean, ladies, that children should pop up
like mushrooms every time you spread your legs. It's not that hard to
take 10 minutes to be responsible! If you can't afford children,
then you need to save up for at least condoms and spermicide (and
don't just use the spermicide dumbasses! I've heard that excuse
too!) if not morning after pills as well.
I
don't know how the law operates in other states and countries, but in
North Carolina if you don't pay your child support, your ass ends up
in jail. Now, to be fair, the way that the child support rate is
figured is not always just to the paying party (which is not always
the father), and if the paying parent's circumstances change, it's
usually next to impossible to get that rate decreased. However, in
most cases, I have very little sympathy when mommas and daddies end
up in jail for not paying child support, especially when the child
was born completely out of any sort of wedlock or other serious or
religious relationship, and you owe on more than one child by more
than one partner. Suck it up and take your month in jail or go get a
fucking job and stop fucking everything that moves!
